FUNNY VISIONS OF LOTR CHARACTERS
by QTmadeline87
Summary: These are just some rather humorous images of LOTR characters livin it up. R/R pleez.
1. Default Chapter

Funny visions of the LOTR characters

This fic was not designed to copy, plagiarize, or steal any of the LOTR characters. Thank you and have a nice day.

This fic was, however, designed to make you chuckle. These are some funny visions of various LOTR characters. All you really need to be able to see these things is a big ole' can o' Mountain Dew. Enjoy!!!

Vision 1:

FRODO AND THE HOBBITS

It's a sunny day in the Shire. Everyone is going about their normal business. Nice little Hobbit children are playing, nice old hobbits are working in their gardens. It's just a regular, typical day and everything is ordinary. Suddenly, FRODO enters Stage Left. He assumes a not-so-very-manly pose and music begins to play. You recognize the music as "It's Raining Men" by the weather girls. 

"Have we got newwwws for you!" Frodo says, acting painfully gay as he struts about to the beat of the hot disco music. 

As the music goes on, you realize that this is not what J.R.R. Tolkien envisioned for the story of The Lord of The Rings. In fact, this isn't the story at all. 

"It's Raining men! Hallelujah, it's raining men, amen! I'm gonna go out, I'm gonna let myself get, absolutely soaking wet!" Pippin, Sam, and Merry, some more hobbits, enter from either side, grinning widely, singing along, and acting twice as gay as Frodo. (nothing against gays, or anything, ya know…)

The hobbits have all got umbrellas made from clear plastic, that, of course, completely clash with their Middle-Earth attire. At the end of the song, the hobbits whip sunglasses from their pockets and strike a pose reminiscent of one found in a Las Vegas strip club. They all walk off Stage Right, smiling and laughing among themselves. Frodo is complaining about his agent and how he doesn't get paid enough to do this job. Just then, Gandalf (who is not yet dead, mind you ::: wink ::: ) walks into the pastoral scene.

"Macho Man" begins to play. 

"Macho, macho man! I've got to be a macho!" Gandalf walks around like a chicken, does the disco "finger" move a la John Travolta in "Saturday Night Fever"

The music stops suddenly, and Gandalf calmly walks over to his wagon, climbs in, and drives away, humming "Macho Man"

Ok, so its stupid. I can do better. You just wait… this scene was created under the influence of immense amounts of caffeine. So go get some caffeine for yourself and you will understand. Maybe. 


	2. Legolas

LEGOLAS

Image #1 for Legolas:

The fellowship walked silently through the forest. Everyone was tired and hungry and cold. An annoying humming could be heard, however. It was coming from Legolas.

Legolas looked up as everyone stared at him. "What?" He exclaimed.

The fellowship continued in solemn solidarity. Just then, Legolas stopped.

He fell to his knees and looked at the sky. 

"I keep on fallin' - iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin love… with-a you!" The rest of the fellowship began to sing along, a la gospel choir. 

"Sometimes I love ya… sometimes you make me blue!"

Image #2 for Legolas:

Scene: An archery competition. Legolas is preparing to shoot. Being the expert archer that he is, Legolas is expected to win the competition.

A hushed silence falls over the crowd. Frodo, Aragorn, Gandalf, and the rest of the Fellowship are watching intently. The mood is sober. As Legolas raises his bow and takes aim at the target, everyone in the audience is silent. 

Legolas shoots, and misses the target by a mile.

The crowd erupts in murmurs; people are surprised that such a wonderful archer missed such an easy target. Everyone grows quiet suddenly. They all turn to look at Legolas. He snaps his bow, throws it to the ground and begins to stomp on it. Then, Legolas looks to the sky and screams,

"FU*K!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The mothers in the crowd clapped their hands over their children's ears. Everyone's eyes were round and large. But Legolas isn't done.

"FU*K!" He screams again "SH*T DAMMIT! I HATE THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Legolas takes an arrow from his quiver and stabs himself. He dies.

Okay, ::: raises eyebrows ::: that last one I didn't make up I had to publish it b/c I heard it w.o.m. from a friend who wanted me to publish it for him so… yeah…


End file.
